im up at 3.30 in the morning. i was woken up by the sweat slowly moving by the side of my face. my eyes wide open and my mind was in a trance state. yes i have been thinking. about my life. reflecting on what wrong and right have i done. what made me this way. the way i am right now. i thought of my future. what will happen to me. yess i admit im scared. im scared if i cant make it into poly. the poly of my choice and the course im aiming for. for the first time in my life im scared for my studies. if i blow then i think its the end for me. i dont know what i'll do next. well thats not the only thing that is clogging up my thoughts. not being in love has really changed my life. honestly speaking i really miss being in love. yess i really do. my friends advice me to find a new girl but i dont think im ready for another relationship. not now. maybe the right girl havent show up yet. or maybe the girl hasnt capture my heart. god knows. V day is coming and its nice to see everyone planning to give their loved ones something. some are gonna buy/make stuffs and some just wanna spend a romantic day out with their loved ones. i wish all couples out there a happy V day and god bless you for being together. cherish and love each other like theres no tomorow..